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September 2015

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Lost in Hell

My best friend has had to move.

The reasons are complicated and not really relevant, but a few weeks back she, her two kids, and her fiancee moved from the home they had been living in for years to her fiancee's mothers house in Albany, Georgia (Yea, I know! I live in Georgia and I didn’t realize we had an Albany! Go figure).

When she first told me they were going to have to move I thought she was going to Augusta, which is about the same distance but easier to get to (just hop on I20 and go east; For Albany you go I20 to I75 South to GA300 South); so I initially thought she would be okay. Augusta is a great city with colleges, theaters, and arts akimbo! It has history and culture.

Albany is not Augusta.

My friend is something of a bohemian, a real free spirit. She an artists, A Wicca, and utterly un-self-conscious. I can relate two stories that might convey exactly how she is:

1 - She went shopping with me and my wife once (ONCE). We were in an upscale woman's clothing store and while my wife and I were over looking as some shirts my dear friend had wondered into the lingerie department. After a bit she grabbed her chest (which is ample, and that is an understatement) and yelled across the store to us “I cannot find any bras to fit my huge tits!” I was both proud of her and mortified.

2 – Its a story she told, but I do not doubt its veracity. When she was on tour with the Renaissance Festival (she spent three years wondering the country selling corsets and clothing) and a younger guy was hitting on her. For whatever reason she wasn’t interested (he was probably under 6'3” - she likes em big!) so she asked him how old he was. He was 19 (She was 26 I think). She then asked him how many women he had been with. Puffing up he said 5. My friend laughed and said, “God, I have been with more women that that!” Totally torpedoed the poor boy.

I am trying to find things for her to do there. They supposedly have a decent zoo (The Chehaw Wild Animal Park – one of only two accredited zoos in the state [the other is Zoo Atlanta, which I need to get too soon – they have a pair of baby Sumatran Tigers]), something called the Fossil Sand Dunes, and some museums and parks. I am trying to find things for her to do, so any help you might have would be appreciated. If you know anything about Albany, Georgia please leave a comment. I would be expecially interested to hear about art, Wicca, and other people/places/groups in the area.

Well I am off. Be well.